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August 31, 2007

Enquirer Exclusive! Nationals Solve Parking Conundrum!

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"We're part of a huge development project for this city. If we're a disaster, everybody around us will be a disaster of monumental proportions."
(Mark Lerner, via Washington Post, 8/29/2007)

Lerner, Kasten, believe car transporters may be the answer.

According to sources with no direct or indirect knowledge of the situation, the Washington Nationals believe they have solved the impending parking nightmare at the new Nationals Stadium with the purchase of a fleet of car transporters. According to the plan (not to be confused with The Plan), a "significant" number of fans who choose to drive to the new stadium will be accommodated by driving their cars directly onto a waiting car transporter. In an exclusive interview, Stan Kasten may or may not have told the Enquirer: "We proved just how creative this organization will be going forward a few weeks ago by signing an 18 year old kid [Jack McGeary] to what is basically a $2 million package and then letting him head off to a 4-year keg party, a.k.a. college. So in that spirit, we knew we had to get creative with this parking problem. Thomas Boswell can shove it, as far as I'm concerned. Problem solved. People will just drive up in their cars up onto the car transporter and then it will drive around the block for 3 hours while the game is going on." Ted Lerner was unavailable for comment.

Meanwhile...

Reinforcements are on the way! How about Balester?

Is the NAAAts-Bonneville radio deal a done deal? Still doesn't answer the question of what's gonna happen to Chuck Slowes and Dave Jageler? Totally unrelated: what about Bob Carpenter over at MASN (at the very least he has a future in blogging?)? If The Nationals Enqiurer has a say: we give a vote of confidence to all 3. We like Chuck, Dave, and Bob.

   

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